Thursday, June 25, 2009

What doesn't kill me makes me stronger, right?

I sure hope so...

Been another rough week. Was in the hospital from Mon-Wed with pre-term labor. Only about 1 cm dilated and cervix is still pretty thick at 3cm, but still having lots and lots of contractions, some of which are now painful. I got my steroids on this trip to the hospital and got lucky in that I didn't have to get Mag Sulfate! Only increased my Procardia dose from 10 to 20mg and the contractions began to improve.

There are consequences of course to this new dose: LOTS of swelling and shortness of breath. I can't really speak normally anymore, can only whisper. But the real story is the swelling. OMG. From my hips down to my toes, I'm at least 3 times my normal size. I can't walk really, just kinda shuffle along since I can't bend my feet and lost my ankles a few weeks ago. My knees don't bend either, which makes going to the bathroom every hour definitely more tedious. I kept showing my swollen legs and feet to docs and nurses in the hospital and none seemed to be overly concerned. Hmm...I guess I could chalk it up to my new Procardia dose of 20mg. Just not sure this is normal to me. And, not that I can see the lower ankle area, but my Mom and Aunt said that my bottom feet were turning a little bluish gray color, obviously indicating poor circulation. Just trying to figure out if this is normal or abnormal! Go back in am for another OB appt.

Boys are still growing well. Luke measures in at 4lbs 4 oz and Harry measures in at 4 lbs 13 oz. Yay! They are the only reason I'm hanging in there. I know that sounds like a "duh" statement, but seriously, I don't think I could be doing any of this if it were for myself. I am miserable! If it were me, I would've gone to a dr and said "fix me" several weeks ago! But keeping them at the forefront, I keep thinking I can hang in there for a short period of time. I would like both to be weighing in at 5 lbs, so that should be around 34 weeks. That's 10 more days. That's my goal. Anything beyond that is great, but that's all I think I can do. I'm looking at my poll results thus far and realize that you all have a lot more faith in me than I do in myself! I'm relying on my faith and hope to get me through, but my goodness it's hard!

Thanks for all your kind and sweet remarks on the below post. You all are the best. Trying to get caught back up on your blogs soon!

19 comments:

Sky said...

Jill, maybe that's all normal but it sounds a little scary, honestly. Please make sure this swelling (and the bluish color) is seen carefully. I know you will but sometimes we women don't like to make a fuss.

Wishing you much relief from all this swelling and that you'll soon have 2 very healthy boys in your arms and a healthier body to walk around in. ;)

ashley said...

Keep it up, you're doing great. It has to be more than tough on you, but you're gonna make it. I hope the swelling gets better at least.

hopeful #1 said...

Thinking about you and hoping for the best! I'm so sorry to hear about the swelling but hope that it goes down soon!

Leigh said...

Hang in there!! You are doing such a great job for your little men. I'm sorry to hear you're in so much discomfort and I hope, too, that the swelling situation gets under control or at least isn't dangerous. (Though that sounds a bit scary)

Suzanne said...

Ouch! That does not sound fun! I hope the swelling decreases so soon! I admire your strength!

Leigh said...

YOu're doing great. Honestly! Although it does all sound very uncomfortable.

I'm very grateful that I (only) have to complain about how sore it is to walk with this big belly of mine!

My goal is 36 weeks - I'm hoping and praying I make it!

P.S. I voted 35 weeks for you :)

Just Another Infertile said...

Oh, poor you Jill! This sounds like your swelling is extreme. I hope the docs can find some way to give you relief. I can't imagine carrying twins and nice big boys at that. You are hanging in there. Not too much longer now.

Jill M. said...

Wow Jill, sounds miserable! I've been torn between transferring 1 or 2 cgh normal blasts... after reading what you're going through, I think it would be best to stick with eSET.

Hang in there mama, you're doing great and it will be here before you know it.

Lea said...

Sounds awful, Jill. I hope you get some relief soon. Glad to hear that the boys are doing well though!

Jen said...

Hang in there, you're doing great. I can't imagine how you must feel. I am 34 weeks with just one baby and feel really crappy too. You can do it!!!

Robert and Carmen said...

Sorry you aren't feeling well. Hang in there - it will all be worth it when you see those boys!

meinsideout said...

You are amazing. ((HUGS))

Kate said...

It sounds really rough but hopefully you can get to 34 weeks when the boys will be stronger. You are doing an amazing job and hopefully the time goes by quickly and without too much more pain.

Chelle said...

YOU CAN DO IT!!! Hang in there!

Polly Gamwich said...

hi there ... I'm back ... I've lost your blog since week 20 when all the sudden "courtney" posted something and then I'd try to click through and it went nowhere!!

Well, I'm here now and will try to make up for lost time!

Me said...

Hope you're doing well and your feetsies have some more color in them now!

meinsideout said...

I hope that you are doing okay.

Ashley said...

Hang in there, girl!

Wendy said...

Thinking about you, Jill...

Hope you're doing okay. :)